Mal Duane Coach

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Archives for January 2013

Alpha Chick: Christine Kloser – Her Story of Transformation

 Christine Kloser is a Spiritual Guide, Award-Winning Author, and Transformational Book Coach whose spot-on guidance transforms the lives of visionary entrepreneurs and authors around the world. Her passion is fueled by her own transformation in January 2011 when letting go of the last shred of stability and security in her life was how she discovered her truth. From that place, she fearlessly (and faithfully) went on to quickly create the most abundant, impactful and joyous success of her life. She now blends her passion for personal and global transformation with her gifts as a transformational book coach – and as a result she’s impacting tens of thousands of messengers across the globe. Learn more at //christinekloser.com/

We all experience life challenges that looking back we can see were the catalyst for living a deeper, more authentic life. What has been your greatest personal challenge that you’ve overcome that served as your pivot point to transformation? 

The greatest personal challenge I faced was the demise of the business I’d built by trying to do everything right. I’d seen all the “guru’s” and learned what seemed like the “sure-fire ways” to grow and build a big-time business. I did everything I was “supposed” to do. I built my list, I positioned myself as an expert, I introducedd a high-level six figure coaching program, I hosted a big live event, I enrolled clients into a year-long mastermind program, I had a half-million dollar year. It looked like a dream come true for any aspiring entrepreneur. But, inside something didn’t feel right.

In fact, I had gone to my coach in the middle of it all and outright said, “This doesn’t feel right.” I was quickly assured that I was “nuts” and everything I was doing was great. Yet, my heart continued to ache, the lack of peace and joy in my business continued and the challenges followed as quickly as the success came. Challenges with clients, my business partners (at the time), the economy and “credit crunch,” my marriage, my finances… everything started to crumble. At first it was a slow crumble over the course of a few years, and then in December of 2010… that slow crumble turned into a final and fast CRASH!

When I was in the middle of this challenge, it appeared as though the problem was my financial situation. But, now, looking back I clearly see that the financial challenges were a result of other things. They were a result of my desire to make everyone else happy, at the expense of my own happiness. They were the result of being afraid to stand up for myself. They were the result of my lack of self-worth and lack of belief that I could succeed if I did things “my way.” The list could go on and on.

Basically, I was lost inside and continually striving for external “success” to fill that place inside of me that felt empty and not good enough. The decisions I made came from this wounded place as did the people I attracted into my life.

It was a very difficult time of my life – to lose everything. Yet, it was also the most powerful time of my life. I wouldn’t wish these challenges for anyone, but I can honestly say that I’d do it all over again myself if I had to… because without this challenge I wouldn’t be living the life I am today. And, I truly love my life… and my business!

Describe the transformational moment or wake-up call when you realized that life change was necessary? For many, it’s a spiritual awakening, an emotional downfall, or a life-altering experience that shakes us awake. 

The moment that truly changed everything occurred at about 10:30 AM EST on December 1, 2010. I can remember it vividly. That was the moment that thing got worse… after I thought they were already at rock bottom. If you’ve ever experience that feeling of having the rug pulled out from underneath you when you already felt like the FLOOR was gone… that was my experience.

You see, in June 2010, my husband and I had to make the most difficult, and gut-wrenching decision of our lives. After my business crumbled around me, it left me with basically no income (aside from the little I made from the publishing part of my business, where I’d brought a partner in to help me with that piece). It became clear that there was no way that I could support my family, and cover our bills on what I was making in that partnership. And, I was mentally, and emotionally incapable of trying to sustain my own business that had been crumbling for a few years. So, after months of trying to see if there was any way to avoid it… there wasn’t… and we filed for a personal bankruptcy.

It took months to make the decision because we just couldn’t imagine going through that. We’d lose our house, have our credit record ruined, and I’d have the “stigma” of being a financial failure.. at least in my mind. But, the day came on December 2, 2010 (my birthday) that it was time to sign our papers and allow the next chapter of our lives to unfold.

And, as I share this next part, I truly have to thank God for working so miraculously and powerfully in my life to give me the exact experience that would literally throw me to my knees in despair…. this moment changed everything.

On December 1, 2010… less than 24 hours before I was going to file bankruptcy papers (something I felt I could do knowing that I could then focus on the partnership I had to serve authors and make enough money to support my family) – I received a FedEx letter from my business partner’s attorney stating she didn’t want to be partners anymore and wanted to buy my shares of the company.

You would have thought a football player slammed into me and knocked me down… that’s how powerful this news hit me…. like I had been smashed to the ground and left to lick my own wounds. I was in a fog, certain that this couldn’t really be happening… but it was. And, over the course of 6 week of trying to flip things around and buy out her shares (I’d put 6 years into building that part of my business prior to inviting her to join me)…. I finally surrendered to God’s will. I let go of it. I surrendered the last thing that felt like any security or stability in my life. I felt like I was left with nothing.

But, soon discovered that I finally had EVERYTHING I’d ever needed… and more!

After experiencing your personal wake-up call what were the most powerful steps you took to change your life? 

There were many things I did to help transform this time of despair into the most fruitful, peaceful, joyous and fulfilling time of my life! The first thing I did was “rally the troops.” By that I mean I leaned on my closest friends for support, I let them love me and remind me of the light that was still within me.

I also allowed myself to feel the depth of the despair, pain and anger that was coursing through my veins. I didn’t shy away from it, I dove into it. I went through a gazillion boxes of tissues. I wrote many letters to God to release the pain inside of me and burned them ceremoniously as I prayed for this feeling to leave my heart. Which leads me to the next thing… I prayed nearly non-stop! I was well aware of the fact that if I were to make it through to the other side, that I couldn’t do it alone, nor could I do it just with the support of my family and friends. I began to lean on God ever more than my friends and would spend several hours a day in prayer and meditation. It was in these moments where the peace and joy began to fill me as I learned to trust that everything really was happening for my highest good.

I truly had never felt more peaceful and happy (at least at that stage in my life) than when I was filing for bankruptcy, losing my home, going through a difficult partnership dissolution, having challenges in my marriage with all the stress we were under financially, etc. The only thing I can say is that it was GRACE that saved me and helped turn things around.

Even through these challenges, I would see signs of grace EVERYWHERE and in ABUNDANCE! It’s as if suddenly I had eyes that could SEE what was really happening. It felt like nothing short of a miracle to witness so much grace. Oh, it was magnificent!

This peace and joy that I came to feel allowed me to move on and open up to new possibilities. I allowed my intuition to finally guide me more than my rational mind. I listened to the nudges, followed the guidance I was receiving and moved forward on faith. And, it was astonishing to then have things change in warp-speed for GOOD in my life! Every ounce of the challenge was worth it because the gifts so far have far surpassed anything I could have done had this challenge not happened. God truly does work in incredible ways to get us exactly where we’re meant to be.

Please share a Positive Mental Shift tip that woman can implement today to support them on their journey of transformation and empowerment. 

Change your perspective! As soon as something challenging happens to you, immediately begin to ponder what the GIFTS could be in that challenge. When you look at everything that happens as SERVING your highest good… you can open your eyes to see things from a much higher perspective. A perspective that will bring you much peace on your transformational journey.

 

HEAR her powerful story of transformation on the
Positive Mental Shift FREE teleseries and CLAIM HER FREE GIFT!

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Alpha Chick: Kristine Carlson – Her Story of Transformation

 Kristine Carlson is a Mom and Nana to her grandsons. She is the New York Times bestselling author of five books including: “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff for Women,”Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff in Love” “An Hour to Live, An Hour to Love,” “Heartbroken Open” and “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff for Moms.” She has appeared on many leading National Radio and Television shows including: Oprah, The View and theTODAY show. She is inspirational speaker who speaks on all topics involving life and “Living the Big Stuff.” She is a blogger and contributor on several popular sites including Positively Positive. Learn more at //www.kristinecarlson.com, //www.dontsweatmoms.com or //wwwdontsweat.com.322

We all experience life challenges that looking back we can see were the catalyst for living a deeper, more authentic life. What has been your greatest personal challenge that you’ve overcome that served as your pivot point to transformation? 

My life was humming along, as usual, one winter day when I received the phone call that shattered my heart. My best friend, husband and the love of my life for twenty-five years, had died suddenly from a pulmonary embolism while on a flight. It didn’t matter that he was the bestselling happiness guru of the era and author to the Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff book series; he died in mid-life and twenty-five years early. I hope this is the greatest challenge of my life. It definitely put everything he taught the world and my entire philosophy to the test. I wrote a book about my experience called “Heartbroken-open: a memoir through loss to self discovery.” As my ego shattered with my broken heart, my authenticity grew like a forest reseeds itself with fire.

Describe the transformational moment or wake-up call when you realized that life change was necessary? For many, it’s a spiritual awakening, an emotional downfall, or a life-altering experience that shakes us awake. 

I wasn’t living as awake before Richard’s death as I was after. His death rocked me to my core, often leaving me on my knees in complete surrender to grief. It was like a fully pressurized water hose hit me in the face and I knew I had been “Heartbroken-Open” to feeling my life at a deeper level. I now know that we had a sacred contract between us that said: You will grow richer in your soul for having suffered loss. It sucks to grow that way, but my soul is grateful. His death breathed new life into me. This is the gift every time we lose someone we love: To remember life is short and we must live every day as it can be our last. Time, is a most precious commodity.

 After experiencing your personal wake-up call what were the most powerful steps you took to change your life?

 The steps I took in my healing and those that brought transformation were:
1. I found my COURAGE by embracing grief rather than resisting it. I made grief my friend.
2. I listened to my body. There is an innate healer inside us. I allowed my body to teach me how to grieve.
3. I chose to learn and grow amidst adversity seeing this loss as part of my life 101 soul work curriculum.
4. I gave myself permission to “Feel to Heal” allowing all my emotions to be in full expression.
5. I followed the S.T.A.R.R. mantra: Surrender, Trust, Accept, Release and Receive.

Please share a Positive Mental Shift tip that woman can implement today to support them on their journey of transformation and empowerment. 

When I think of ‘mental shift’ I think of “Thought” and the role of your thinking in relation to your transformation. Understanding that your thoughts of fear are generally coming from your ego and will move you away from the authentic expression of your highest self is very helpful. Your feelings of fear are your best navigational tool. Move towards your emotional fear and move away from your ego and closer to your authenticity. Your greatest gifts are right behind your fears.

HEAR her powerful story of transformation on the
Positive Mental Shift FREE teleseries and CLAIM HER FREE GIFT!

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Alpha Chick: Katana Abbott – Her Story of Transformation

 Katana Abbott is a Certified Financial Planner, author, speaker, radio show host and a Vision Coach.

Rising from a life of adversity, Katana took her life back with the burning desire to help other women make smart life and financial choices.

Financially independent after 20 years in the financial services industry, she sold her business at 48 to pursue her dream and created Smart Women’s Coaching®, where women can access live group coaching and online resources to grow wealth, fulfill their purpose and simply live a more joyful and abundant life doing what they love. Visit here website to pick up your free prosperity video and workbook.  Learn more at www.SmartWomensCoaching.com

We all experience life challenges that looking back we can see were the catalyst for living a deeper, more authentic life. What has been your greatest personal challenge that you’ve overcome that served as your pivot point to transformation?

Today I live a blessed life. I am married to the man of my dreams, I live in a beautiful home on the lake, have loving friends and family and the financial freedom to pursue my passions doing what I love in life. But it hasn’t always been this way.

I remember my mother telling me about the time when I was a little girl and when we didn’t have groceries or even milk. My grandmother would come over to make sure she had milk for me without telling my father because he was so proud. When we ate potatoes, we had to give the skins to our Labrador because we couldn’t afford dog food. My father was a roofer and many times he would not get paid. This was when he decided to join the Army.

In fact, when my father joined the army, we thought we were rich. The army gave us a beautiful apartment in Germany. I remember my mom saying how lucky we were because we could have a cleaning lady and our apartment really was beautiful. She loved living in Germany.

Then that dream ended when my father died. I was just six and my brothers were just four and two. My dad was a hunter and he had gone duck hunting to bring home Christmas dinner. He never returned – he drowned. It was December 19th, 1964 during Vietnam War.

My mother had to move back to Michigan to be near her family. She was able to pay cash for a small home with my father’s military life insurance. Between her widow’s benefits and driving the school bus she was able to take pretty good care of us. I still remember some really fun times back then even though we didn’t have much money.

But my mother wanted someone to take care of her. She was looking for her Prince Charming. What she ended up with was a monster — literally. I remember the night she introduced us to this man who she said would become our new father. I was terrified and cried myself to sleep that night.

Over the next nine years – our lives were a living hell and my brothers and I lived in constant fear and abuse. Although my mother did not protect us, I know today that she was doing the best she could. She was plagued by obsessive compulsive behavior – her way of numbing out – but this made her unavailable to us emotionally.

I grew up too fast and was given so much responsibly as a caregiver to my grandparents and my brothers at the same time. I also cooked, clean the house and was always out fundraising door to door helping raise money for the poor or to raise funds for our school. This was something I loved and was great at. It gave me confidence. I also learned that I loved helping others or leading a cause. I discovered this when I was just 12 years old.

Often when there is domestic violence, there is also financial abuse. When my mother finally divorced my step father, my youngest brother was in a foster home, she was homeless because my step-father had taken the equity from her home. She had lost all her government benefits, had no income and she had breast cancer.

By this time, I was on my own. Because I was technically a “war orphan”, I had free tuition to college and income from the government to help support me while I was in school.

But the Universe had another plan for me.

In my third year of college, I ended up marrying my own monster. He said loved me, but I knew in my heart that he was evil. He had been a professional student with three Master’s Degrees and needed to keep his green card. He had shown the signs, but because I wanted to be loved and taken care of, I thought I could change him and I married him anyway. I was just 19 and going back to the familiar.

Nine months later when I tried to leave the marriage he put me in the hospital. The detective was taking pictures of my broken and bruised face and asked me who would be picking me up. I had no one to call. I was all alone.

I was also all alone when I went to court for the criminal charges. Immigration had charges against him too and at the court house he was waiting for me. He jumped into my car and he threatened to track me down and kill me if I didn’t drop the charges against him. I believed him and dropped the charges.

Here I was. I had hit rock bottom. I was living in a subsidized town house with no income, no job, and a broken down car. Worst of all, I had lost my father’s legacy. The college education he had left me was gone and I really was all alone.

Describe the transformational moment or wake-up call when you realized that life change was necessary? For many, it’s a spiritual awakening, an emotional downfall, or a life-altering experience that shakes us awake.

So how did I get from where I was back then – to where I am today? In that moment in my life when I had hit rock bottom, a miracle happened. I picked up the book, Think and Grow Rich, by Napoleon Hill and it changed my life forever because I found my burning desire and it gave me hope, faith and I felt inspired. I learned about the Law of Attraction and how I could create any life I wanted if I just had a vision, did the work and never gave up.

Well that became the model for the rest of my life, because I am driven to succeed, a student of life, always learning and studying to improve and I never, ever give up when I have a dream.

My dream was to never be a victim again and to be financially independent. I was just 21. I found a job with tuition reimbursement, health insurance and a retirement plan as a clerk typist. Soon I realized that I was not only terrible at detail work, but it was sucking the life out of me and I had to do something else.

Because I still did not have a degree, I thought what else could I do? And then it hit me, I was great at sales. I had spent years going door to door raising money for the poor and the needy, I was always the top fundraiser at school when we had contests, and at 15, I had even worked making phone sales by calling from the phone book. I know it sounds terrible, but for me, it was fun.

I went to an employment agency and interviewed with two companies; a company that offered services where business owners trade services and a financial planning company called IDS. I took the job working with the business owners. I know today it was all part of a divine plan, because years later I would actually end up working for IDS and the contacts and experience that I gained in those early years would be the catalyst that lead me to becoming one of the top financial advisors in the country.

Although it may sound cliché, I truly believe that everything happens for a reason. We each have chosen to come here with a divine purpose although we have no idea what it is. Our journey in life is to figure this out and it’s normally not easy.

After experiencing your personal wake-up call what were the most powerful steps you took to change your life?

At 25, I took a job selling Hondas and this was a major turning point in my life. Using my selling skills that I had acquired over the last 10 years, not only did I become one of the top earners in the company (earning six figures in today’s dollars), but I met my fabulous current husband who I’ve been married to now for almost 30 years. He came in to buy a car from me.

Over the next 20 years, I did do the work and I got smart about money, I became a CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER™ helping hundreds of people achieve their financial goals. I was at the top of my game
And then something happened…I had this feeling there was something more to why I was here. A purpose I was not fulfilling in my soul.
I realized that while helping my clients achieve their financial goals I often found myself helping them find their souls purpose and follow their dreams.
But what was MY dream? Well the Universe has a funny way of helping us get what we truly want when we make a decision.
What I did next changed my life. I hired a coach who guided me spiritually and what I discovered was helping my clients find their soul’s purpose and follow their dreams was actually my soul’s purpose and my dream. It’s what made me truly happy.
Because I had created a team and systems to so my business could literally run without me, at 48 I was able to sell my financial planning practice to my partner for $1,000,000 to follow my dream of helping women on their journey of self-discovery, healing, guidance, and building abundance and prosperity in their lives.
I founded a global online community called Smart Women’s Coaching® with the intention of creating a community of women working together to reinvent their lives and grow wealth while following their passions and life purpose.

Please share a Positive Mental Shift tip that woman can implement today to support them on their journey of transformation and empowerment.

None of this was easy. In fact so much of it was very, very difficult, but when I look back over my life, I can now see that it was a series of steps in an ongoing process that I have used over and over to overcome my fears and manifest each dream. I actually call this process The Six Pillars of Awakened Prosperity System and it starts with the Dream, then Discovery, the Leap, the Plan, the Dance and finally Mastery.

All of it was perfect — the experiences, good and bad so that I could fulfill my life purpose. There are three very simple secrets that make this whole process easier so you can go to the next level in life, aligned in your true purpose and they are:

1. Finding a mentor or a guide who has been where you want to go and following them. It takes 10 years or 10,000 hours to become an expert in your field – so shorten this journey with a guide. This could be a program even a book.

2. Identify your tribe and surround yourself with people who love and support you and who will hold you accountable to your dream. Don’t do it alone.

3. Learn how to manage your energy and mindset. So often we give up just before we reach success, or because of limiting beliefs or because we need to the tools to keep us inspired and able to finish what we start.

I am a contributing author in a book called, Thank God I, titled “Thank God I was Abandoned and Abused”. Now I look for the gift in every experience because it’s always there. The secret is never losing faith and trusting the process. Once you do, the magic begins to happen and life begins to flow.

 

HEAR her powerful story of transformation on the
Positive Mental Shift FREE teleseries and CLAIM HER FREE GIFT!

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Alpha Chick: Jodi Chapman – Her Story of Transformation

jodiJodi Chapman is the author of the inspirational blog, Soul Speak; the upcoming book, Coming Back to Life: How an Unlikely Friend Helped Me Reclaim My True Spirit; the Coming Back to Life Ecourse, and the bestselling Soulful Journals series, co-authored with her amazing husband, Dan Teck.

After experiencing a spiritual awakening in October 2010, she went from being a complete skeptic to a believer in miracles and the magic that is always occurring all around us. She now lives her life with love and faith in the driver’s seat, and she hopes to leave a trail of inspiration wherever she goes. She believes that we each have the ability to hear our soul’s whisper and create our best lives.

She lives in southern Oregon with her beautiful best friend/soul mate Dan. They share their lives with four fuzzy kids: a sweet Norwegian Elkhound, Xena, and three wonderful cats: Biddle, Buncom, and Elsie. Learn more at  //www.jodichapman.com

We all experience life challenges that looking back we can see were the catalyst for living a deeper, more authentic life. What has been your greatest personal challenge that you’ve overcome that served as your pivot point to transformation? 

Ten years ago, my life looked very different than it does now. I had just gotten divorced, and I was feeling very guilty about hurting my ex-husband. I had just started working at a new job as a technical editor. It was the first job that I ever had that paid well and made it so that I could afford to live on my own. The only catch was that I was working for the Department of Defense. (Not the best place to work for someone who isn’t a big fan of war.) It was right after 9/11 though, and I justified working there because I love my country and wanted to do my part in protecting it. Then the Iraq war started, which made the documents that I was editing much more real. People were dying, and somehow I felt like I was a part of it. This definitely didn’t sit right within my soul, but it felt so good to support myself for the first time. It felt good to be free and independent. But at the same time, my heart hurt and I cried every day.

On August 30th, 2002, I had a dream that I was in a horrible car accident. I dreamed that a white van turned left right in front of me, and I crashed into it at full speed. When I woke up, I felt unsettled, but was so thankful that it was just a dream. I went out to run errands and was on my way home when a white truck pulled out in front of me, and I crashed into it at full speed.

That was the day that changed my life forever.

Over the next two years, physical therapy and doctor visits were part of my weekly routine. Disability checks came in which turned into unemployment checks when they laid me off at my job because I wasn’t able to come back. I moved in with my new boyfriend (now husband), Dan, and I camped out on the couch each day where I stewed in anger about how much my life sucked and how angry I was that I was in constant pain. I was so angry that I had lost my independence. I was so angry that the woman who turned in front of me didn’t even help me at the scene of the accident. I was so angry that she was underinsured, and that my settlement wouldn’t be as much as it should’ve been. I was angry that I could no longer edit because it hurt too much with my neck and arm injuries. Basically, I spent a long while feeling incredibly angry and incredibly sorry for myself.

But this is only part of the story.

I believe that we attract into our life what we believe we are worthy of.

Just before the car accident, I went to see a therapist because I was feeling so guilty about divorcing my husband. I had fallen in love with someone else (Dan), and while nothing physical happened between us until after I ended it, I still carried this guilt. I felt like a failure. I had made a commitment, and I was supposed to honor that. My therapist asked me how long I planned to punish myself for this change of heart. I said (with a completely straight face) 10 years. And I meant it.

Just one month later, the car accident occurred. Last August was my 10-year anniversary of the accident, and just one month after it someone entered my life who showed me how to eliminate my pain completely. Finally, I was free of it. Finally, I was able to release the guilt and the punishment and allow myself to be happy!

I now see the car accident as one of the biggest blessings that has ever occurred in my life. I don’t know how long I would have stayed at my job had I not been taken out of it. I needed that big of a jolt to wake me up and help me to realize how far away from my soul I had gone. It led me to take stock of my life and see how I wasn’t living it the way I wanted to be living it. It led me to exactly where I am today, and that’s definitely something to be grateful for.

Describe the transformational moment or wake-up call when you realized that life change was necessary? For many, it’s a spiritual awakening, an emotional downfall, or a life-altering experience that shakes us awake. 

Two years after the accident, my husband and I created a gift business. We loved that it was a way for us to work from home together and create inspirational products. We worked harder than either of us had ever worked before to get it off of the ground. And while we had some success, it wasn’t the level of success that either of us dreamed it would be. And it just seemed so hard – a constant struggle.

We had moved into our dream home and believed with all of our heart that the money would come to help us afford this home. We thought that if we set our mind to something, the money would follow. But that didn’t happen. We hadn’t changed our beliefs about ourselves or about money, and so what did happen was our bills increased dramatically, but our income stayed the same. Definitely not a good thing. We were living in a beautiful home, but we were constantly stressed about trying to figure out how to pay for it.

We were renting it with the hopes of buying it once we had saved up enough money. Thankfully, the universe stepped in and helped us get out of our horrible mistake. The house went into foreclosure (the landlords weren’t paying the mortgage), and we ended up leaving and moving into a much smaller, more modest, and more affordable home.

We spent the next few months licking our wounds. That experience had been such a struggle for us – day in and day out, not knowing how we were going to pay our bills. And after years of this, we both just wanted to crawl into bed and stay there until everything was okay again. We were so deflated and emotionally drained.

It was during this low time when I had a dream. In it, a faceless guy held a gun to his head and said that he didn’t believe he would die if he pulled the trigger. He didn’t think any of us ever die. I begged him to put the gun down and tried to get him to listen to me. But he pulled the trigger. And miraculously, he was still alive. There was no blood – only laughing.

When I woke up, I couldn’t get the dream out of my head. I tried to go about my normal routine, but I just wasn’t able to shake it. Later that day, I was on Facebook and found out that my first love shot himself in the head the night before.

This news both took the life out of me and shook my entire foundation. I felt intense sadness for him and was, at the same time, trying to figure out why I had that dream and why I felt so close to him now. It was like I could feel his pain along with my own, which scared me. Before this, I was not open to the other side. I didn’t think about it – and when I did, I dismissed it. I was a skeptic and believed that everything could be explained rationally. Which is what I tried to do for myself. Except signs kept appearing that I could no longer ignore, leading up to him communicating with me. Despite my initial resistance, I finally just gave into it and allowed our conversations to flow.

This experience has changed every single aspect of my life. It woke me up and helped me realize that I wasn’t living fully. It helped me see that I really can break free of my own chains. I really can embrace my time here on Earth.

It truly has been a spiritual awakening that I will forever be grateful for.

After experiencing your personal wake-up call what were the most powerful steps you took to change your life?

It took me an entire year to believe that this spiritual experience that I shared above was actually happening to me. I didn’t have much faith in God or the universe before this, and so I needed proof – lots of it. And each time I received proof, I would need more. It was never enough. So one of the biggest steps that I took to change my life was to trust and have faith in something bigger than myself. I learned that I can’t possibly know everything that’s out there. I couldn’t possibly know the magic that is occurring all around each of us. But what I could do is trust that I am loved, that I live in a loving universe, and that I am always taken care of. And so that’s what I started to do.

I began stepping into the unknown and began listening to my inner voice. I stopped saying no to life and instead said yes. I began embracing it. When opportunities came my way, I stopped shying away from them. I allowed my light to shine. Each time I thought that I was too afraid to move into something that seemed scary, I remembered that I was here – that we are all here – to open up to the possibility, to move through our fears, and to live our purpose rather than be afraid of it.

Like I said above, my life is completely different now than it was just a few years ago. Sometimes I pinch myself when I look at how wonderful it’s become. I now know for a fact that when we are on our path, the gifts and love are never-ending! And no, that doesn’t mean that everything flows perfectly all of the time. What it does mean, though, is that I now know that a greater force is helping to guide me through this journey, and that there are no mistakes – just lessons, growth, and experiences. We can always come back to love, which is always at our core and always all around us. This makes me feel very happy and so very blessed.

Please share a Positive Mental Shift tip that woman can implement today to support them on their journey of transformation and empowerment. 

Start saying yes to life.

I spent most of my life living in fear. I said no to so many opportunities because I was afraid of them. I didn’t feel confident enough. I wasn’t sure that I was worthy of them. And each time I turned them down, my light grew dimmer, and I began to shrink away from life.

But I have found the opposite to also be true. When I consciously began to embrace my life, each time I said yes I could feel my inner light growing. I felt stronger and freer and lighter and happier. And what’s really wonderful is that the fear wasn’t as strong anymore. My fear muscle had been so overused for so very long. But once I started building up my confidence muscle, it began to overtake the fear. I began to realize that I really was powerful, and I really could do so much more than I ever imagined.

And that’s what I wish for everyone: to realize how powerful they truly are. To know, without a doubt, that they have the ability to change their lives with one conscious choice at a time. We all do. And we all can create miracles in our lives when we begin to take chances, take leaps, and say yes.

 

HEAR her powerful story of transformation on the
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Alpha Chick: Terri Amos Britt – Her Story of Transformation

 Terri Amos-Britt is on a mission, uniting moms to heal their lives, setting examples for their families to thrive. Terri is a spiritual coach, energetic healer, author of the award-winning book, “The Enlightened Mom,” and founder of www.TheEnlightenedMom.com. Sharing her story as a mompreneur, wife, mom, stepmom, and former Miss USA, Terri teaches moms energetic tools to shift their lives and homes from emotional chaos to peace, miracles and abundance. Terri says, “Peace comes when we take responsibility to heal our own lives…one person at a time. And it starts with Mom first. When mom heals…the family heals…the world heals!” Learn more at  TheEnlightenedMom.com

We all experience life challenges that looking back we can see were the catalyst for living a deeper, more authentic life. What has been your greatest personal challenge that you’ve overcome that served as your pivot point to transformation? 

I lived most of my life believing I had to be good to be loved. My fear was that if I weren’t a “good girl,” I would be punished. I wouldn’t be loved. I wouldn’t be accepted. I WOULD be alone.

I was terrified of being alone. I feared that in my aloneness I might suffer and die. I don’t think I realized this when I was young. I just knew I didn’t like the feeling. As an adult and spiritual coach, I now know that our egos keep us in survival mode. It’s like the old pack animal mentality. If you are separated and alone, you die. I didn’t know this back then. All I knew was that I didn’t like feeling alone. I can even remember as a young child knocking on my friend’s door to discover no one was home. As I sat in her yard all by myself, I thought, “I am all alone in the world.” What a harsh belief to take on at the ripe old age of seven! But I did. That belief became my filter. And because I wanted so desperately to feel connected and loved, I began to perform for others’ love and approval.

Performance for me meant to behave, be nice, think of everyone else at the expense of myself, not share my thoughts and to always, ALWAYS, put on a happy smile even though I felt like I was dying inside. The problem with performing, however, is that I expected people to perform for me in return. And when they didn’t, I went nuts! I would go emotionally “wacko” and out of control. I’d have my happy face on one minute and the next, flip out. This wasn’t all the time, but it happened a lot. This created a cycle of guilt and shame in which I constantly sought love and forgiveness from the people I loved, yet, never felt good enough to receive it.

I felt so bad on the inside that life became a competition. I competed because I was in lack on the inside. I lived my life being a good girl believing that if I did things right, I would WIN people’s love. I believed that being the best and winning was the only way to survive. I became the epitome of the over-achiever. Whether I was a straight “A” student, a leader in multiple organizations in both high school and as an adult, a homecoming princess, teacher’s pet, television host, or even Miss USA, which I won in 1982, I constantly tried to fill myself up by being the best. Other people’s opinions always came first. That’s why I performed. I lived from my head instead of my heart. It was as if there was a list in my mind called, “What a Good Girl Does to Win Love.”

My need to achieve became a drug. With each win, I felt my ego screaming out a great big YES! But on the inside, I knew something was missing. In fact, in the moment of winning Miss USA my spirit asked, “Is this it?”

Winning wasn’t IT. However, I didn’t discover what IT was until I became a mom.

Describe the transformational moment or wake-up call when you realized that life change was necessary? For many, it’s a spiritual awakening, an emotional downfall, or a life-altering experience that shakes us awake. 

I spent my life searching for love. I did it in school and with work. I didn’t feel love in that world, however, and eventually left everything to become a mom. I felt a calling and believed that being a mom would fill me up. What I quickly realized is that my need to be the best still haunted me. I wanted to be the best mom I could be. Yes, I wanted this for my kids, believing this would make them happy. But deep down, I wanted to be the best so that they would love me in return. Here was that theme again. I didn’t want to lose their love and be alone. I wanted them to grow up and tell me that I had “done it right” and been a good mom. I knew I was failing, however, when I collapsed at my stepson’s bedside, saying through uncontrollable sobs, “I don’t know how to love you!”

When I came into A.J.’s life, he was almost five. He’s now 29. I had a list of “good child rules” for him, just like I lived by. I truly believed that as I tried to control him and “make” him be good, that I was doing the right thing. I felt I was being the best mom I could be. I believed I was preparing him so he would not only survive, but also thrive.

I couldn’t stand myself. I had so many expectations to be good, both for this child and for myself as a mom. But deep down I knew both of us were hurting. Instead of winning, I felt like a complete failure. I knew A.J. had to feel the same way, too. I hated when I screamed at him or emotionally lashed out. I also felt jealous of him. I had so much lack inside that I felt as if I needed to compete against him for his dad’s love. I knew this couldn’t be right. This didn’t feel like love. It felt like survival.

I KNEW something had to give when my girls, Mackenzie and Kolbi, were born. I loved my babies so much. I didn’t want to continue this cycle of pain and struggle. I just wanted to be peaceful, joyful and filled with unconditional love.

It was at this time that my dad died. In my younger days, daddy had always been my hero. I loved and adored him. The problem was that he didn’t love himself. He was a broken man when he died. He had lost everything in bankruptcy and slowly pulled away from all of our family. He was there physically, but had separated from our love. Dad had expectations and rules for himself that he couldn’t meet, and in the end, couldn’t forgive himself. And because of this, he shut down to love.

Daddy’s death was the second part of my awakening. I began therapy some months after he passed and soon realized that I was a lot like him. I was really hard on myself and my heart was shut down like his. My therapist could see that I was wound pretty tightly and suggested I get into meditation. That’s when my world opened up and I stepped onto a magical adventure!

After experiencing your personal wake-up call what were the most powerful steps you took to change your life?

When you make a decision to be unconditional love, you open your heart to give and receive love freely. Things you never knew about yourself are revealed and magic and miracles appear! Unconditional love connects you to God. As you stand for this in your life, people and things show up to support you. That’s what happened to me. I knew I wanted to shift but had no idea how. The therapist’s guidance to get into meditation was the avenue to take me there.

I was intrigued by the idea of meditation. Almost immediately, I met a new friend who encouraged me to join her at an energetic school for meditation and healing. The first night in meditation class I saw a spirit move across the room! I must have looked white as the ghost I saw because the teacher asked me what I was seeing. It was the coolest thing I had ever experienced! I had no idea that I could see!

I was on a miraculous journey and quickly entered the school’s healing class, working with guides and energy. Oh my gosh! My world opened up in ways that I never imagined. Michael, the archangel, became my guide and friend. Plus, through his help, I started doing energetic healings on classmates. I learned that we are ALL able to work with energy and that we can tap into guidance and healing any time we want. WOW! I no longer felt alone. I felt I could call on guides and angels for help whenever I wanted. What a relief!

What was really cool about connecting to the other side is that I no longer felt that looking for love outside of myself was IT. I knew there was more and was on an adventure to find it.

My quest continued into a 13-month clairvoyant program. Here I learned tools to not only look at a person’s energy and to see and clear their blocks, but to also look at my own. This schooling proved to be invaluable as the next part of my awakening was revealed.

A little girl showed up in my mind’s eye as I sat meditating one day. This little five-year-old is the child inside of me. She is my heart and is the way I was created. As I sat there and cried and cried, realizing that I had never really acknowledged her nor accepted her, I heard, “Get up and write this. This is the beginning of your book, Terri.” That was my first book, “Message Sent.” It was my journal of awakening. For the next year while I wrote it, I created a connection to my heart by talking to Little Terri. I gave her permission to stop performing. I told her she could be the way she was created. The problem was that I really didn’t know who she was. So I made every daily situation with my kids, my hubby, and the world around me an opportunity to get to know her. Whenever I felt judgment, blame, resentment, lack, or any negative emotion, I intuitively went within and nurtured and loved this little girl. I asked her what was hurting and dove deeper to see what false beliefs were blocking her. This is where I discovered the “good girl rules” I talked about earlier. And with the recognition of each of them, I released them energetically and asked, “What is your truth?”

GIVING MYSELF PERMISSION TO STAND IN MY TRUTH IS WHERE I FINALLY FOUND THE LOVE I HAD BEEN SEEKING FOR SO LONG!

Every time I asked little Terri what her truth was and then stood in that truth, the pain melted away. I felt a sense of connectedness, of feeling loved and whole. Truth is unconditional love. Truth is God. This is the love we are all looking for.

The gift I discovered in walking this path is that not only did I heal, but so did my family. Because I was now communicating with my heart…God’s greatest messenger of all…and loving myself unconditionally, that love and communication overflowed to my family. No longer did I feel the need to be best, nor to make my kids the best. Because I was honoring and loving the way I was created, I could honor and love the way they were created. All the walls dissolved and our family became whole. Some years later my hubby died and I remarried. My new hubby and I used these same tools to turn our blended family into a whole, loving family in record time. Statistically, most stepfamilies take about seven years to become cohesive. Ours took about two. That’s because we quit looking for others to fill us up and, instead, gave ourselves permission to stand in our own truths.

Please share a Positive Mental Shift tip that woman can implement today to support them on their journey of transformation and empowerment. 

I’ve taught people all over the world to heal their lives with the energetic tools in “The Enlightened Mom” book and workshops. These are the tools that healed my life, as well as my family. There is one truth, however, that stands out above all others that I would like to share with you. If you make a commitment to do this today, your life will change in amazing ways!

STOP PERFORMING FOR LOVE!

STANDING IN YOUR TRUTH MEANS YOU ARE HONORING AND LOVING THE WAY GOD CREATED YOU.

YOU ARE PUTTING GOD FIRST!

Most of us don’t know how to put God first. For many of us, due to family or religious upbringing, we believe that to put God first means to deny ourselves. But it’s exactly the opposite. Our old programming says that for us to put God first, we must be good. But as my life so clearly exemplifies, when you deny who you were created to be, you create pain and suffering. You disconnect from God. But by loving yourself and nurturing your heart, that little child within, you create a connection. You become the essence of love. Life becomes easier. You open up to receive God’s guidance, support and love, as you’ll see in the following story.

Last year, I was led on a magical journey of healing to Barcelona, Spain, to have surgery for Chiari Malformation I. I had asked for a kinder, gentler way to heal this physical pain. Chiari can lead to blindness, loss of hearing and loss of usage of your appendages. In the U.S., the surgery is quite intense by cutting out the back of the skull and cauterizing inside the spine to create an opening for the cervical fluids to flow. Not only is the surgery rather radical, but the recovery is also very long. So after realizing that my life had come to a standstill after two years of putting off the surgery, I said, “Okay, God. I am ready to have this surgery, but if there is a kinder, gentler way, please show me the way.”

THE NEXT DAY, I met some people at the local outdoor mall after admiring their dog. Through our conversation, they mentioned that their son was very sick with Chiari. My mouth dropped and so did theirs when I told them I was struggling with Chiari as well. The next shock came when they told me about a doctor in Spain who did a much less invasive surgery that took 45 minutes, went through the lower back rather than cutting out the skull and then you’re out of the hospital the next day. I was blown away!

I was in Barcelona six weeks later. Now here’s the really cool part. God had a plan for me on my trip to Spain, but I didn’t truly realize it until I was sitting on a tour bus the day I arrived in Barcelona. I was tired, but didn’t want to go to bed so I could get my body acclimated to the time zone. I looked through a brochure to discover that there was a local monastery tour. I was excited, as I had been hearing in my meditations for months that I needed to visit a monastery. I just figured it was a message telling me to rest. But, NO! There was a much bigger message for me to receive.

As my hubby, Charlie, and I sat on the bus, the tour guide explained that we were heading to the mountain of Montserrat, and that it was one of the seven most sacred mountains in the world. He went on to explain that the monastery there was in honor of the Divine Mother. As Charlie would say, I had the biggest possum-eating grin on my face when I heard this. I knew something was up, especially as we both felt the intense energy of the mountain. It was only after I decided to stay at the monastery hostel to recover from my surgery that I learned that the belief there was that the Divine Mother takes you to God. Woo hoo! Through my own path as a mom and then being guided to write “The Enlightened Mom,” I knew that nurturing and loving yourself unconditionally brings you to wholeness. But God wanted me to see it clearly by guiding me to a monastery across the world.

When you tap into the Divine Mother inside of you, you tap into God. Whether you’re a man or woman, you have this loving, nurturing, receptive energy that is a part of you. When you stop performing trying to win others’ love and approval, and take a stand for truth, you align your heart with God, opening up to abundance and miracles.

 

HEAR her powerful story of transformation on the
Positive Mental Shift FREE teleseries and CLAIM HER FREE GIFT!

PMS Banner_420x90 for Blog interviews

 

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