Blog – Page 9

Big Time Gratitude for my Soulful Ladies

Last week I went to an educational conference in Connecticut. I was surrounded by a roomful of inspired souls who love doing work similar to the work I love doing with women. The energy in the room was indescribable. It was one of those defining moments in life when you know you’re on the right path. No way would you feel this good if you weren’t.

This was a group of highly successful people who are inspired by doing what they love. Many would do it even if they weren’t paid for it. Does that scream a brilliant message of joy and life’s purpose? Many of the women had been inspired by a life crisis, painful loss or an awakening to their own personal divine consciousness.

I am not talking woo-woo here, I mean people living their true purpose. Guess what? It doesn’t get any more empowering than that. Sadly, many people are clueless and go to work hating what they are doing and never discover what they could be great at. Fear of the unknown paralyzes them from stepping out of a lifeless but familiar routine.

You have to take chances to grow, to create, to make changes. Anything really good that helps you transform your life requires an element of risk. Being receptive to what the universe has in store for you and letting go of your will requires courage. The fear of not being good enough can hold you back. I know it did for me for many years before I discovered my true potential and purpose. I wrote a book, I stepped up and started doing lots of interviews and appearances. I became inspired to coach women and teach them to find their purpose and power.

Let me introduce you to some of the women standing around me in the photo at the top of this post. Stacey Martino decided, in a moment of gut wrenching pain and sobbing tears, to take a chance and place her trust in making a commitment to her then boyfriend, now husband, Paul. They have traveled the globe studying (becoming experts) and teaching Love and Passion Success. My mentor, Linda Joy who went from being a single welfare mom to publisher of ASPIRE magazine. Then there is the feisty Italian Sugar Free Goddess, Lisa Rosati who built an entire new successful business after the emotional lows of an abusive marriage. Oh, and she has a new hottie for a husband. Kim Turcotte left the grind of corporate data analysis to becoming an online business manager extraordinaire with people lining up for her services. They are all powerful examples of overcoming fear and following their hearts.

I am so grateful for being able to connect with these beautiful souls, to call them my friends and to follow them on a path of passion and purpose. My vision is to live in a world where all women feel appreciated, experience deep love, honor their desires and discover their purpose.

The mantra that I would like to share with you is:

“Be authentic, live joyfully and serve others”

Your life will end up being greater and more fulfilling than you ever imagined.

Live Faithfully,

Mal

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Mal Duane is a Best Selling Author and Personal Life and Recovery Coach who has overcome life challenges using the steps in the Alpha Chick Process. Her personal mission is to help women excel in all areas of their lives from business to personal relationships. Mal has been featured with Fox 25 Boston Morning Show, CBS Radio, Aspire Magazine, Healthy Living and Metrowest Daily News. She has also been a featured guest on over one hundred Blogtalk Radio shows discussing recovery and personal transformation.

Mal’s book, Alpha Chick, Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power, is a best selling book and is available on Amazon.com.

Kick the “But” Word to the Curb and Reclaim Your Life!

How many times in your life have you declared you wanted to be or do something and then followed it up with the “but” word. “But” is a huge self-manifested block that keeps you from being and doing all that you are meant to. “I want to lose weight but… “ “I want to stop drinking but…” “I want to have a relationship but…” “I want to be pretty but…” It is so easy to live in a pattern of “I want this but unfortunately that happened”. Well truth be told – that is a major cop out.

There is nothing holding you back unless you allow it.

This week is the opening of the Reclaim Your Life Event where you will hear gripping stories of personal perseverance from my heart-centered guests. They too, have struggled in their own journey and are joining me to share their intimate stories of hope, love and transformation. These amazing visionary entrepreneurs never considered “but” as an option.

Pain became a very powerful motivator for these women to reclaim their lives. In fact, it inspired them to step up, embrace who they are and use that power to serve others.

And, it is possible for you to release the shackles of pain, shame, guilt and self-condemnation that hold you back, and recapture the self- love you yearn for.

You don’t have to do this alone. Some of my greatest breakthroughs in life came when I opened myself to receive the guidance and support from women who have walked the path before me.

So please join me from 12:00 PM EST, every Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday from March 4^th through April 10^th, and listen as these extraordinary souls share their truth with the intent to inspire and support you in releasing the past, so you may reclaim your life.

Mal Duane
4^th March 2014

Live Faithfully,

Mal

If you like our content sign up here for updates and a free gift!

Mal’s book, Alpha Chick, Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power, is a best selling book and is available on Amazon.com.

Reclaiming Your Life Lessons

Is your life spiraling down emotionally? Is your heart filled with fear and keeping you from being the magnificent soul you are meant to be?

Your heart is a magnetic energy center that sends vibrations out to the Universe. So, what you hold in your heart shows up in your life physically. We spend a lot of time talking about our thoughts but forget to dig deeper and see what is in our hearts.

Whatever you hold in your heart, whether it is love or fear, acts as fuel for the thoughts running through your mind. If you have a heart filled with love, then bless you! You are on your way to creating the life you desire. Sadly for most of us, fear outweighs the love, attracting what we don’t want. So how do we tip the scales?

Starting on March 4^thand running through April 10th, I will be hosting 17 women in a series of discussions exploring how, at a deep and revealing level, we turned fear around and found love on the other side. Each speaker will bear her heart, the nature of the atrocity that caused her crippling fear. Some of these stories brought tears to my eyes. I struggled with the reality that I might not be able to cope if it were me.

You are going to have access to such luminaries as Rhonda Britten who discusses the murder/suicide of her parents, Crystal Andrus who reveals her sexually abusive youth and Cheryl Hunter who shares the gruesome circumstances of her rape as a young model in Europe. These are stories of unfathomable loss, emotional plunder and physical sabotage.

They are women who took their painful experiences and made them their greatest teachers. The pain they experienced inspired us to step up and discover a soul-centered purpose to help other women. Each of them serves women in their uniquely divine ways through coaching programs, books and online training. You will also receive valuable free gifts from my guests that will help you in your own transformational journey.

To fully understand compassion, I believe you need to experience the pain on a personal level. Every speaker this season on www.ReclaimYourLifeEvent.com has walked in the shoes of personal pain, emotional challenge or transformational growth.

I am inviting you to join all of my guests in this inspiring and heart-felt series. Go to the website and sign up for your free access.

I am passionate about helping women discover how amazingly powerful they can be. When you learn to love yourself, you become an unstoppable force of scintillating love for others to follow. I have spent the past six months working on and producing www.ReclaimYourLifeEvent.com for you. I hope you will be touched and inspired by the honesty, love and courage these women share.

Live Faithfully,

Mal

If you like our content sign up here for updates and a free gift!

Mal’s book, Alpha Chick, Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power, is a best selling book and is available on Amazon.com.

Who Do YOU Think You Are?

Do you think you are superior or do you struggle with low self-esteem? The fact is that we are all born the same; we come from the same divine source – everything in the Universe comes from this source. We have the same energy that holds the stars in the sky and turns the Earth.

Now that is powerful. But what happens to make us feel less than that? What dims the power we are born with?

I have two theories on this. The first is that other people’s opinions or perceptions weaken us. They distort our vision of who we are. We start becoming more like what they think we are and less like what we really are and, as a result, we feel the need to compete and compare. Wake up! Their opinions are self-serving or fear based. So my suggestion to you is, try to understand that someone else’s opinion of you is none of your business. I don’t know who said this originally but I think it is brilliant.

My second theory is a little more personal. Do you apply yourself? Women that apply themselves have more fulfilling, joyful and meaningful lives. If you don’t apply yourself, you will never know your full potential.

How much you get out of life is directly related to how much you put into it. The old statement that somebody is so lucky and gets everything is crap. You better take another look. The women I see that really enjoy life are making it that way.

Life is really simple if you chunk it down. There are four areas where you need to apply yourself in order to live the life you deserve and connect with the divine feminine power you were born with:

Mental/emotional (which includes family and friends)
Physical/health
Financial/career
Spiritual

By maintaining balance and personal application in these four areas, you can create the life you desire. If you are suffering or unhappy, where does the problem lie? Every woman I coach creates a plan for each of these quadrants. If they feel challenged in a certain area, they can apply specific actions to support positive change in that quadrant. You can’t control other people but you can control when and how you choose to apply yourself. So why not go for the GOLD! Start to envision your life the way you want it. If you don’t expect it, how can it happen?

If you want to get on the fast track for creating the life you dream of, then personal coaching maybe the perfect option for you. To learn more, set up a Discovery Session) in the month of February and get 60 minutes for the price of 30.

Live Faithfully,

Mal

If you like our content sign up here for updates and a free gift!

Mal’s book, Alpha Chick, Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power, is a best selling book and is available on Amazon.com.

Is it love or is it an addiction?

Do you feel your happiness is predicated on being in a relationship? Do you feel incomplete without a man?

Why do women base their self-worth on whether a man loves them or not?

Well, I have the answers for you. Being completely transparent, I must admit I was addicted to love. Or, should I say, the feeling of being loved by someone else. The only problem was, the men I picked didn’t love me back. Yes, I was one of those women that felt the only way I was complete and happy was to have a man paying attention to me.

I spent many years pursuing useless relationships that caused me more pain and self-loathing than love. I wore my heart on my sleeve, so that others could rip it off and walk over it. The men I attracted didn’t have any sincere interest in me but liked being seen with me. The harder I tried to make them like me, the bigger the rejection I would experience.

In other words, I was looking for love in all the WRONG places. I realize now this is a very common situation for women with low self-esteem. Read these words very slowly:

A man will never complete you

He can only enhance your life. Anything more is too much responsibility for one person. Your truest form of love starts within you. If you don’t love yourself, then you can forget about a man loving you. The harder you try, the faster they run. Bottom line, you need to have something in order to be able to give it away.

Here are 5 updated rules for romance:

If you feel like you can’t live without him, you should.
If you are doing all the work to make it happen, then you need to step back.
Meditate daily on the fact that you deserve to be loved, starting with being loved by yourself.
Keep your clothes on until you know what the other person’s intentions are.
Be yourself, it’s easier to sustain being the real you than it is to be a weak imitation of someone else.

Loving relationships do not need to be so challenging. But if you continue to put the wrong vibrations out, you will keep attracting the wrong men. A real relationship is a mirror image of the one you have with yourself. Do the inner work so you can experience the outer joy of connecting with someone who truly appreciates and loves you.

Live Faithfully,

Mal

If you like our content sign up here for updates and a free gift!

Mal’s book, Alpha Chick, Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power, is a best selling book and is available on Amazon.com.

Resolutions or Intentions? Don’t set yourself up for failure!

Every New Year we set resolutions to diet, to stop a bad behavior, break up with a jerk boyfriend or some other action we think is necessary to be successful or happy.

But wait a minute; three days into the New Year, the resolutions get kicked to the curb. What’s with that?

Why do we fail miserably at keeping our promises to ourselves? Are the resolutions we make realistic for where we are at today? Is there too much dramatic change required to ever get the ball rolling?

‘Resolution’ means finding a solution to a problem or, something settled or resolved. Being 20 pounds overweight or drinking a pitcher of stingers when you are out is far from resolved to me – as is hanging out with that criticizing toad of a boyfriend because you are afraid to be alone.

So should you set resolutions or intentions to create change and stop bad habits? ‘Intention’ is an anticipated outcome that is intended or that guides your planned actions.

I don’t know about you but that sounds a whole lot better to me, when creating change in your life. Especially the part about planned actions. How many times have you anticipated something happening and then it just happened? Voila!

So what planned actions have you decided on to help you accomplish your goals or resolutions for this year? Up to now you probably didn’t have any.

To create change in your life you must set an intention, you are sending out a desire, energetically, so that the Universe can respond by manifesting what you wish. A goal is more like a wish written on a piece of paper.

So how do you set intentions for 2014?

First forget your resolutions if you haven’t already.
Decide what your top 3 intentions to create desired change are for the New Year. Don’t make so many you can’t live up to them. Write them down.
For each intention, write a detailed description of what it looks like. (E.g.: I want to lose 15 pounds and drop 2 pant sizes by 6/30/2014). Be specific about what you want, with a measurable result and a date of completion. Completion dates are instrumental.

Now make 5 action steps for each intention that will support you in achieving your desired outcome (E.g.: Have just one piece of toast at breakfast, no bread at lunch, instead eat protein or vegetables, have an afternoon snack of fruit or yogurt, have dinner portions the size of your fist, do 30 minutes of cardio 4 times a week.

Make sure you read your action steps every day to reinforce your success.

By using this simple process, you will be the action hero of your own life instead of feeling like a failure for not keeping your resolutions.

I would love to hear how you do! I encourage you to set up a discovery session to review your intentions and implementation.

Live Faithfully,

Mal

If you like our content sign up here for updates and a free gift!

Mal’s book, Alpha Chick, Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power, is a best selling book and is available on Amazon.com.

Forgive and Forget

Twenty five years ago today, I had my last “taste” of alcohol. I hit what is commonly referred to as a “high bottom”. I was a high performing woman, gainfully employed but hit my emotional bottom. The empty shell of a woman that I was, cracked open so the light could touch the dark shrunken soul within me. I had been talking to God and saying that maybe I should die. His reply was “oh no dear child, you can’t leave now, you have way too much work to do”. In a flash my life changed dramatically.

Instantly my thinking went from chaos to clarity.

I no longer was consumed with the self-absorbed me, me, me but now considered the possibility of we, we, we.

I didn’t focus on just getting and started to think about giving.

I realized I was responsible for everything that happens to me and stopped blaming others.

Joy and peace started running through my veins and the struggle for perfection was gone.

I stepped away from my pain and discovered that I had the power to do anything I wanted.

So my dear sisters wherever you are, know that I love you, I understand your story and I am here to help you. I consider myself a spiritual warrior out to slay the dragon of addictive behaviors that spreads the scorching flame of destruction over us.

What better day than today, to make a list of all the old crap, old boyfriends and old stories that you want to leave behind so that you can start tomorrow free from the self-imposed (sadly to say) chains that keep you tied to the past. Rip that list up into tiny little pieces. Burn it CAREFULLY. Dance, twerk or whatever you like, regardless of who is watching. Throw your arms in the air and proclaim your freedom and forgiveness to the moon. Start a new day in a new year with a little less baggage.

If you are interested in the complete story of my journey and amazing transformation, you will find it in my book Alpha Chick: Five steps for moving from pain to power.

Let me know how you feel tomorrow.

Gratefully, your sister in recovery.

Mal

If you like our content sign up here for updates and a free gift!

Mal’s book, Alpha Chick, Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power, is a best selling book and is available on Amazon.com.

What Is the Best Christmas Gift you can give?

[awsmvid play=”0″ hide=”1″ skins=”14″ size=”2″ ]//youtube.googleapis.com/v/zvg7jtIFGpA?fs=1&hd=1[/awsmvid]How about giving someone extra love? It’s free and you will never run out.

Is another electronic gizmo really the way to someone’s heart? What about a beautiful hand written note, telling them how much you value and love them.

Why are we are so quick to criticize the differences we notice in someone else, what are we identifying in ourselves? Let’s embrace our imperfections and those of our loved ones. The universal acceptance could send ripples of energy out to the world could help those struggling with self-love.

How many disasters could we divert by spreading more love and less hate? Many people who lashed out in violence this year did so because of the internal pain they felt.

By practicing and teaching loving kindness you are able to have a profound impact on your community. Your energy will spread to others who will then go and impact even more people. The most important thing you do in life is not how much you acquire but how much you are able to love.

First, start with yourself by showing kindness and forgiveness in your own life, then look at your family. You will receive greater pleasure from this simple gesture than anything you could purchase.

A Buddhist tradition when you are preparing to die is to ask yourself “Did I love well”. Only you can create the answer. Make a resolution to experience life looking through the lenses of love.

When you do this you will create personal growth, more peace in your life and an awakening to your purpose. You are all born with a purpose but it gets covered over by the debris of life.

I am holding in my heart the intention of love for all of you. I value our connection through my blog posts and website. My mission is to serve you and help you with challenges that are taking you away from your purpose and power.

Nothing is more important to me than you reclaiming your life from the emotional gremlin residing within your heart.

My Christmas wish for all of you is live without regret and love well!

Happy Holidays

Mal

If you like our content sign up here for updates and a free gift!

Mal’s book, Alpha Chick, Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power, is a best selling book and is available on Amazon.com.

How to Spot a Growing Addiction

Substance addiction can come in several different forms, stemming from recreational usage or even from a medical prescription. It can be difficult to distinguish between harmless usage and a growing addiction, either in your loved ones or yourself. As far as the physical signs go, here are some behaviors to look out for in those that are close to you.

1. Changes in Physical Appearance
You may be aware of a loved one’s occasional usage of a drug or alcohol, but watch for physical signs exhibited in more inappropriate circumstances. If you notice large pupils, bloodshot eyes, and slurred speech during strange times like a family outing, this could be an important warning sign.

2. Running Out of Prescription Too Soon
If you or someone you know uses up their prescription sooner than the doctor ordered, this could indicate a growing dependency. If there is a desire to continue to receive monthly prescriptions even though the pain has lessened, this is also an indication of potential addiction.

3. Shirking Obligations
Obligations like school and work become less important when the brain is running off of an addiction. Watch for changes in responsibility and behavior; if someone is continually showing up late or skipping work completely, they may be struggling with a developing problem.

4. Change in Finances
If you see a significant change in finances, such as an uncharacteristic lack of funds or even stealing money, this is a big indicator of a consistent habit. If someone is being overly secretive of their finances, it could be that they’re trying to hide where their money is going.

5. Personality and Mood Swings
Any unusual mood swings (especially if they occur more frequently) point to a growing dependence on an addictive substance. Overall drastic personality changes also point to an addiction, so trust your instincts and observations when analyzing your loved ones.

6. Socializing with New Crowd
A sudden change in socializing habits is often connected with teen drug abuse, but it also applies to adults. If a person has dropped a group of friends for a new one, and especially if the new group of friends has questionable habits, this could be an indicator of a slippery future.

What to Do Now?
It’s difficult to recognize some of the signs when you’re looking at a loved one, but as the support system you’ll need to be aware of what’s going on. On the other hand, if you’re worried about yourself and whether or not you’re growing a substance dependency, you can and should be a little more honest with yourself by answering some questions:

• Have you built up a tolerance to whatever substance you’re using “casually,” causing you to use more and more to feel the same effects?
• Do you use the substance to fill a void of some kind, whether the void is represented by sadness, anxiety, or anger?
• Have you begun to use the substance just to feel normal?
• Have you begun to question whether or not you should be using at all anymore, and yet you continue to?

There is hope for you, and you don’t have to wait for all hell to break loose before you get help. There are plenty of teams over medical research in Cleveland, OH and other cities that are working daily to find the best solutions for tackling addiction early. You can find some form of help in every community, whether it be support groups, medical programs, or rehabilitation centers. If you or someone you know seems to be starting a descent into drug addiction, tackle the problem before it’s too late.

Chris Miller is a professional writer, blogger, and English grammar enthusiast. Chris enjoys learning about new health products, procedures, and ideas. For more information about medical research studies done on drug usage and addiction, visit Rapid Medical Research website.

Live Faithfully,

Mal

If you like our content sign up here for updates and a free gift!

Mal’s book, Alpha Chick, Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power, is a best selling book and is available on Amazon.com.

25 + 25 = 50 Addiction +Recovery

To you, this may look like a simple mathematical equation but actually it represents 50 years of my life. You see, I started drinking at the age of 16 and drank for 25 years before it became unbearable. As many times as I told myself to stop, I just turned around and picked up another drink. People who aren’t alcoholics, or who are not cursed with addictive personalities, just don’t get it.

The bright side to this equation is that I now have 25 years of recovery and live my life as a happy self-loving soul.

Fifty years is a long time to spend focused on and around alcohol. To you it may seem like “Oh my God, what a waste”. But to me, it makes perfect sense. You see, we all have a higher purpose in life. Some of us leave this earth and never know what that purpose was. Well, during my recovery, I discovered exactly what my purpose was:

To teach women that they are infinitely more powerful than they believe: that they do indeed have the power to change their lives and create exactly what their heart desires.

It was part of my journey to come to this realization through my experiences and intense struggle of personal transformation. All of a sudden, I knew exactly why I had traveled the path I had been on. My journey gave me ‘in-the-trenches’ education on how women can become emotionally wounded and continue on a path of self-destruction.

In my case, I developed a feeling of being worthless while I was a teenager. The feelings propelled me into a frenzy of blackouts, severe hangovers and dead-end relationships. In 25 years of drinking, I also had a failed marriage to give me the final push off the cliff, where I did a free-fall into the black abyss of complete hopelessness.

Hopelessness is the most devastating state of mind. You live your life thinking “why bother?” Why bother to get up? Why bother to eat, to plan, to dream or to breathe.

Yup, that’s where my journey took me. I don’t regret it because what I have learned from it you can’t find written in the pages of a book. Even when I wrote my own book, I still couldn’t describe fully what I have learned from years of alcoholism and self-condemnation.

But let me try to summarize what I do know. I was born a perfect being, but then life started to influence the emotional fibers of my mind. Other people’s perceptions and words became more important than my own. I tried to live my life being what others expected of me. I just wanted to fit in and be loved.

I have learned that I am an amazing and talented and loving woman created by God, not to suffer, but to live life with passion and purpose. To share what my lessons have taught me so that others will not make the same mistakes I did. To help women reclaim their lives from the emotional chaos they now live in. So many women are secretly suffering and do not know where to turn. I am here to bring them hope, to help them discover a better way – a path of light no matter how far they have gone in the wrong direction.

We all have ‘befores’ and ‘afters’ in our lives. Some are longer than others. Look at your own life. Is there a defining moment that changed your path? I invite you to share a piece of your story. Feel free to do so here or you can post on my Facebook page www.facebook.com/malduanecoach.

By sharing we not only empower ourselves but shed a beam of light on the path of our beloved sisters.

Live Faithfully,

Mal

If you like our content sign up here for updates and a free gift!

Mal’s book, Alpha Chick, Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power, is a best selling book and is available on Amazon.com.

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