Blog – Page 13

Let’s All Live By The Golden Rule

Let’s all live by the golden rule!

“The wound is the place where the Light enters you”

Rumi

If we paid more attention to the people in our lives, how many suicides or over doses do you think we could prevent? Sadly after the event has occurred and the families start a forensic psychiatric investigation, they always find the clues. Cell phone records and computer files are usually very helpful in creating a timeline of a downward spiral. Instead of constantly checking our own emails and text messages, maybe we should monitor our children’s more closely.

In Massachusetts there was a landmark case when six teenagers cyber bullied a beautiful young girl, Phoebe Prince. Phoebe started dating the ex-boyfriend of a malicious young woman who organized a group of classmates to torment her for several months. The outcome was that Phoebe ended up hanging herself. The cyber bullies were tried in court and found guilty. So many lives ruined for nothing. I am hoping to connect with Phoebe’s mother this month for an interview to discuss what we can do in our schools to prevent tragedies like this.

Although October is Stop Cyber-Bullying Month, I am sharing these resources now so we can all make a conscience effort to make a difference. School is back in session and it is a perfect time to teach kids the rules of social media and online engagement. These are my suggestions and I hope you find them helpful, I have also gathered some resources which are listed below.

Don’t post anything on the web that is detrimental to ones character or their appearance.
Understand that you are legally responsible for all content you put on the Internet.
Monitor incoming and outgoing communications on all social networks that your children have a presence on. You may identify someone else being abusive to others.
Encourage your children to report anyone to you that is posting negative comments about others. It is your responsibility to do something about it.

If we all pay attention we can eliminate tremendous heart ache globally for kids that are being attacked by their peers. Too many children lost their lives this year due to the severe bullying and character assassinations that were written by thoughtless, unconscious and unmonitored kids.

This is not just for kids, cyber-bullying often happens with adults and in the workplace.

I truly believe that if we collectively shine a light in the wound that is bullying, we can make a significant difference!

I would love to hear your experiences, thoughts and questions, please share them with the Alpha Chick community on our Facebook page; or if they are of a more personal nature please email me at malduane [at] alphachick [dot] com.

Live Faithfully,
Mal Duane

Mal Duane is a Best Selling Author and Personal Life and Recovery Coach who has overcome life challenges using the steps in the Alpha Chick Process. Her personal mission is to help women excel in all areas of their lives from business to personal relationships. Mal has been featured with Fox 25 Boston Morning Show, Aspire Magazine, Healthy Living and Metrowest Daily News. She has also been a featured guest on over thirty Blogtalk Radio shows discussing recovery and personal transformation.

Mal’s book, Alpha Chick, Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power, is a best selling book and is available on Amazon.com.

Coaches are for Olympians and YOU too!

“Victory is in having done your best. If you’ve done your best, you’ve won.”

–Bill Bowerman, US Olympic Coach, track and field, 1972

The books are closed on the 2012 Summer Olympics and what a show it was, from the stellar opening ceremonies to the fantastic closing ceremonies and every jump, leap and dive in between!

I thoroughly enjoyed every minute and it’s such a valuable reminder of the power and fortitude of the human body and spirit.

Watching the intense relationships between the coaches and athletes made me remember each and every coaching relationship I have had and the value these relationships have brought to this Alpha Chick!

During this trip down memory lane I compiled the checklist below of all of the coaches I’ve had since childhood:

Voice
Piano
Tennis
Modeling
Real Estate
AA Sponsors
Fitness
Spiritual
Life
Business

Oh my, it certainly takes a village doesn’t it!

This little exercise made me realize just how many people helped me to become the person I AM truly meant to be. I asked myself… who would I be without them? How would my life be different if I did not have the opportunity to learn and benefit from even one of these brilliant mentors?
Honestly, I am done living in the past and I don’t want to know… I am happy and grateful beyond words that each and every one of these people has touched my life in some meaningful way and look forward to the magnificence that future coaches will bring to the table that is my life.

I also spent some time thinking about the people I have coached and what I have brought to their lives, this journey was particularly meaningful. It makes my heart sing to know that MY work can make a difference.

So, the question was do YOU need a coach?

I say ABSOLUTELY!

I would love to hear your experiences, thoughts and questions about working with a coach, please share them with the Alpha Chick community on our Facebook page; or if they are of a more personal nature please email me at malduane [at] alphachick [dot] com.

Live Faithfully,
Mal Duane

Mal’s book, Alpha Chick, Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power, is a best selling book and is available on Amazon.com.

Soul Journey to Love: 100 Days to Inner Peace by Dr. Irene A. Cohen, MD

I’m honored to host the Virtual Book Tour of Soul Journey to Love: 100 Days to Inner Peace by Irene A. Cohen, MD.

“Would you like to reach a state of inner peace, undisturbed by thoughts, feelings, or outside events? Soul Journey to Lovecontains 100 inspirational messages, prayers and processes for you to reflect upon and apply. The messages appeal to those who are interested in meditation and quieting the mind, and also to students of A Course in Miracles and non-dualistic philosophies. By reading these short, devotional entries you can be returned to your true self, to love and to God.” The book is endorsed by Larry Dossey & DavidPaul Doyle.

Enjoy this great article on Starting A Meditation Practice by Irene A. Cohen, MD

Research on meditation over the last 35 years has shown benefits to stress reduction, pain management, athletic performance, blood pressure reduction and so much more. In meditating, one learns to quiet the sympathetic nervous system (the “fight or flight response”) and increase the parasympathetic nervous system (the normal physiological functioning of the body of which we are usually not aware).

I am often asked what the benefits of meditation are and how to meditate. Many people feel they are too busy to take time out of their day or that they can’t quiet their minds enough to sit still. Yet they realize that they would like to achieve the effects of meditation, having been exposed to it at the end of a yoga class or by hearing about it in the media. In fact, a 2010 survey showed that more than 75% of Americans felt their stress level was high.

One should first set aside a regular practice time daily, either at the beginning or the end of the day. It is better to be seated and not lie down, because you do not want to fall asleep while meditating. The purpose is to have a focused, calm awareness and in sleep we lose awareness. You do not need to set aside a large portion of time to begin with, since you want to build up your practice to about 20-30 minutes. Try to sit for 1-2 minutes to start, then for 5 minutes, 10 minutes, or 15 minutes. Eventually you will be able to meditate for longer times. It is good to set a timer at the beginning in order to have a sense of how long a minute or two really is.

Secondly, in order to quiet the mind, most people need a focus of attention that is away from their thoughts. There is no need to obtain a mantra from a guru to focus one’s attention. Research done at the Benson-Henry Mind Body Medicine Institute at Harvard by Herbert Benson, M.D. showed that the “relaxation response” can be induced by thinking of a calming word like “peaceful” or “love.” Choose a word that resonates with you and say it to yourself silently over and over again with your eyes closed. Let thoughts come to you but pay them no attention. Just keep repeating your chosen word. Sometimes you will be lost in the thoughts, and that’s okay. Just return to your word again. Imagine a train passing by, and put the thoughts onto the train as it passes you, letting the thoughts go away. We will always have thoughts, but we need not pay so much attention to them.

There are many types of meditation, from using a mantra, to mindfulness, to just sitting in quietness. Try these simple exercises and then explore the style of meditation which will work best for you. Hopefully you will find that you can bring that calm and awareness you seek into your day.

Irene A. Cohen, MD is a psychiatrist, acupuncturist and interfaith minister who has maintained an integrative practice for almost 30 years. Hay House / Balboa Press just released her first book, Soul Journey to Love: 100 Days to Inner Peace . Visit Dr. Cohen on Facebook, follow her on Twitter, and blog with her at www.drirenecohen.authorsxpress.com.

Purchase Soul Journey to Love: 100 Days to Inner Peace by Dr. Irene A. Cohen, MD today on Amazon and on Kindle and win a signed paperback of Dr. Cohen’s book through August 14, 2012 at GoodReads!

Live Faithfully,
Mal Duane

Mal’s book, Alpha Chick, Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power, is a best selling book and is available on Amazon.com.

Being Your Own Champion

“I think self-awareness is probably the most important
thing towards being a champion.”

Billy Jean King
Olympic Gold Medal Coach, Tennis

With the London 2012 Olympics upon us, I thought it was important to talk about being your own champion. This quote by Billy Jean King, a champion tennis player and a US Olympic Tennis Coach embodies my thoughts on the subject. But, being your own champion doesn’t necessarily involve being an Olympian, it may just involve reaching a small personal goal. But isn’t the path to discovering your true potential and purpose a collection of smaller steps?

I’m a big believer in the power of self-awareness, love and empowerment. I would like to share one of my favorite passages from my book Alpha Chick with you:

“Living my life as an Alpha Chick, I am aware now of my true potential and purpose. Self-awareness and serenity are my reality. Most of the time my life runs like a finely tuned piece of machinery, with all parts working in harmony with one another. I am no longer pulled in conflicting directions. I begin each day knowing and loving the woman I am. I appreciate everything I have: my husband, my health, my homes and my work.”

In life, we can cling to denial so vehemently, that it may become all we know. It blocks out positive energy and binds us to the past. But once you release your self-awareness, you can begin to accept what has happened in your past, stop resisting it and find forgiveness. Only then, you can approach life with a new attitude.

I invite you to download the Alpha Chick Action Guide which is based on the Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power that helped me change my life dramatically and is the structure of my coaching and my book Alpha Chick. The five steps together spell FAITH, embrace your FAITH and use the guide to help you through the changes that are necessary to discover your true voice and become your own champion.

F Focus
A Acceptance
I Identification
T Thoughts
H Healing

Congratulations on making the commitment to begin your personal transformation and embarking upon an amazing journey toward self-empowerment.

If you feel that you need some personal guidance along the way, please check out myEmpowerment Coaching services and packages.

Live Faithfully,
Mal Duane

Mal’s book, Alpha Chick, Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power, is a best selling book and is available on Amazon.com.

Never Let Obstacles Get In Your Way

“Stand up to your obstacles and do something about them.

You will find that they haven’t half the strength you think they have”

-Norman Vincent Peale

In life, you will need to overcome many obstacles to be successful. This is true no matter what goal or accomplishment you are pursuing. If you are reaching toward a large objective, rest assured there will be some problems and roadblocks along the way.

Remember when a challenge appears, there is usually a lesson to be learned from it. Look for the seed of wisdom in the situation even if it is uncomfortable. Don’t allow others to sway you from your purpose. When you seek approval from others, you live by their standards, not your own. Learn to trust your own judgment. With practice you will recognize that your gut feeling is the right one. When you feel the vibration within, you will know that you are walking the right path.

With focus, preparation, training and commitment anything can be accomplished.

Here are my 4 steps to reaching any goal

Focus on your target. Write down in full, brilliant detail the thing you’d like to achieve. Then imagine yourself achieving it. What will reaching your goal feel like?
Gather your thoughts. Use your journal to write down all of the steps it will take to achieve your goal, from beginning to end.
Train properly to reach your goal. Whether it’s a degree, a certificate, or performing more research to gain a better understanding of how to achieve it.
Commit to your goal. Do at least one thing (large or small) to help you get closer to reaching it every day.

Stick to this plan, and before you know it, you will have reached your target

I congratulate you on making the commitment to begin your personal transformation and embarking upon an amazing journey toward self-empowerment.

If you feel that you need some personal guidance along the way, please check out my Empowerment Coaching services and packages.

Live Faithfully,
Mal Duane

Mal’s book, Alpha Chick, Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power, is a best selling book and is available on Amazon.com.